A little forest of different-coloured toothbrushes has grown in the tooth-mug.
'Whose are these?', I ask Offsprog Two.
'They belong to my friends', she replies.
Sure enough, Artyfriend came over this avo, and I could hear her scrubbing away at her gnashers behind the bathroom door.
Sometimes, I believe that it is I who live in the parallel universe, and a normal Helen lives in the real world where no strange things happen.