1. I used to work in an x-ray darkroom at the Royal Victoria Infirmary in Newcastle upon Tyne. There I learned that it is possible to read Mills and Boon paperbacks in the red light that illuminates a photographic darkroom. I also had my ears pierced in sterile surroundings by a radiographer's dad, who was a jeweller. We all did. Ouch.
2. When I was 14 I complained to my mum all the time because the bellringers in the village church got on my nerves with all that dinging and donging. She suggested that I join them. I did, and so did my friends. We all learned how to ring bells, but we didn't do our homework.
End.
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